I am the oldest granddaughter.

From birth I bonded and built a close relationship with my mom's mother. We lived in neighboring towns in Pittsburgh, so spending time with her was a given.

My grandma and I have so much in common. We share the same middle name, Elizabeth; the same birth month, March; the same favorite shade of blue, aquamarine - just to name a few.

We both have a penchant for mushroom pizza, although she may not admit it anymore; we love to sing in church, even though her weary body can't make it to Sunday morning Mass; and we have enough pairs of shoes between us to top Imelda Marcos - feet down.

After my family moved from Pittsburgh to Cleveland when I was 5, visiting my grandma was the highlight of my summers. I remember staying up past my bedtime, gathered around the kitchen table playing card games, word games, board games. We ate pretzels, popcorn, candy and those tiny fish crackers, drank soda out of bottles and talked about life. She told me never to grow old. I insisted on it.

We all should listen to our grandparents more closely. They hold the secrets of the past and the key to our futures. Memories we have of them can reveal truths about ourselves or our families.

I remember trying to jump onto my grandma's bed when it was time to sleep. It was of the four-post antique style, much too high for a child to reach. She would scoot me up and tuck me in, and, in her bed, I was on the top of the world.

When I was a teen-ager, disagreeing with anything my mom told me to do, calling Grandma somehow made the answer clear. Our grandparents always did see our points of view - they always did buy us that giant ice cream cone.

One night, when my grandpa still was alive, the three of us ate supper together, but the peas and mashed potatoes kept drooling out of his mouth onto his flannel shirt. I couldn't stop giggling. He smiled back at me, and my giggles became uncontrollable laughter. My grandma watched our exchange and asked me to stop because I was egging on his habit.

Grandparents look to their grandchildren to relive their youth. Having children around makes any grandparent smile.

Grandma moved in with my family a few years after my grandpa died. She needed help getting around. Her body was weak from caring for him for so many years. She was lonely. Now, I help her into my bed, and we play games at my family's kitchen table.

Even though sometimes I let college get the best of me, and I think the world can't get any worse because I have to work at The Post, attend 21 hours of class, work at Southeast Ohio magazine, meet with myriads of people on campus and study each week, I think of her. My grandma struggles with walking, seeing, hearing and even getting out of bed every morning. She grounds me.

We should look more often to our grandparents when we feel overwhelmed or overworked. Watching them relaxing and enjoying themselves at an old age somehow makes our hard work worthwhile.

I find myself looking for ways to remember my grandma. Simple ways like drinking skim milk like she used to do, telling stories to my fiancé Darren, talking with my mom about her memories.

My mom had a video made of a bunch of old movie reels from her family. Watching it amazes me. Seeing my grandma at my mom's age now is surreal. My grandma was a classic beauty as she spread out a blanket, preparing for a picnic. Her three young children laughed as they chased each other around the park. I want that experience someday.

This year is one of milestones for me. I'm finished with college this quarter, I've accepted my first job in the real world, and I will graduate with my friends in June. I want my grandma to travel to Athens for the ceremony, but I don't know if she'll be strong enough.

Even if our grandparents can't make it here to see us, we'll know that they're thinking of us - that they're proud.

The biggest day of my life will come when I walk down the aisle to marry the man of my dreams in October, but, without her, the day will not be the same.

Every time I see her now she asks me our wedding date; I'm not sure if she forgets or just wants to hear me tell the story once more.

My grandma taught me patience, forgiveness, generosity. She always told me the best gifts come from the heart. She showed me God's importance and how to learn from my mistakes. She taught me how to be independent, work hard and never relent.

Now it's time for me to give her some advice - to show her what I've learned. Grandma, don't give up now. You have many good years left to live. You can see me married, successful and maybe even meet your first great-grandchild by the millennium.

Wood, associate managing editor of The Post, will graduate this quarter.